Slowness*

From my seat
I could see the clouds
Separate entities
Attached to nothing
Flying and floating
Between earth and endless skies
And I wonder
What it feels like
For a person
To be attached to nothing
A free soul
Lingering around
Between dreams and reality
Hopes and mischief
Would it be worth living,
Hanging on to nothing?
Would it be worth to dream,
When dreams are unreachable,
High above?
Would it be worth to live,
When life on earth,
Is the ultimate end
Of life itself?

Recollection of purple nights_ ode to memory*

Thai reflections*

After a sleepless night, I carried my red notebook and pencil around, all day today. Though ideas are invading my mind, words are failing to verbalize. I am not able to write. There is much going on inside… so many challenges, so many endeavors. The closest to balance I got is equivalent to the closeness of the sky to the sea; although you see them entwine, in the horizon, it is only an illusion; and so is my life’s balance – an illusion.

The past four months I have been living in my suitcase. I don’t want to grumble and say that I was not enjoying the action that was taking control over my everyday life – I loved it actually. But I think it is time to settle down again for a while; go back to the pleasant routine – with its trivial ups and downs, at least for a short while.

I have been dragging deadlines at work since forever. I’ve been procrastinating even in my personal life. So many friends I’ve been meaning to see, so many movies I’ve been meaning to catch, so many books I’ve been longing to read … I don’t know how time is flying by! When I think back about the past seven months, I feel as if I am watching a movie and have pressed the ‘fast forward’ button. Maybe I did achieve some triumphs, surely I have flunked many; but definitely I haven’t taken any time to absorb what is going on around me. Everything I am doing, I am doing in a rush.

Whatever happened to the afternoons I used to spend in my corner in the sun, just watching people passing by, or reading a book, or just sipping my coffee without thinking about the million things I have to be thinking about to get things moving? Whatever happened to my peace of mind, my stillness of emotions, my physical ease and carnal harmony?

I am tired … practically from everything and nothing.

I think it is about time to hit the ‘pause’, breathe, and then kick it off again. Yet this time, back to my normal pace of evolution.

Or has ‘fast forward’ become the only way ahead nowadays?

Alter reality

I am sprinting against time
Watching your face fading
In the arms of the clock
Hanging on my wall

I am defying the natural laws of gravity
Sliding upside
Up to your skies
To kiss sunrays lighting up your skin

The picture of you
Haunts my eyes
Your whispers in my ears
Cut out all the noises around me
And leave me alone
In my mind,
In my world of fantasy
In my world of you and i

In this world,
Time is not bound to the clock on my wall
Gravity slides upwards
And sunrays shine day and night

Ode to Europe*

I am running on a rainbow
Wearing high-heeled sandals
My legs feel heavy
But my head feels light
So light, it passes right through clouds
Without the blink of an eye

I see arrows coming
From behind the skies
They reach my skin
Touch it, penetrate it
Pass through it
And I feel as if, swords of ice
Are passing through me

The arrows are colored
Each color prompts an emotion
And I feel disected
Experiencing all sensations that
Could be felt by a human body
All within a second’s time-span

I rest awake - brain-dead

Lucid ambiguity

With only one eye open
I can see half of the world
I choose to see the bright half
Amidst all the dark clouds
That have been reigning over my skies lately

With only one eye open
I will tint darkness with vivid dye
I will dip my gloomy feelings
In a jar of vibrant paint

And I will wait for the rainbow
To surface again
Swallow my soul
Into the core of ecstasy
And leave me dazed
For the perpetuity to come

Room 305

The clock no longer moves backwards
The clock no longer stops ticking at all
The clock no longer exists
And we question its previous existence

I no longer think backwards
I no longer stop my sensations’ flow
I no longer exist
Except in the realm of your reality

You no longer dream backwards
You no longer stop denying your brain’s fixation
You no longer exist
Outside the span of both my arms

wordless feeling*

The page lies white before me
For hours and hours
Ideas roam around my mind
But I never succeed
In pulling them into it
Words seem to be a foreign substance,
Sentences complicated entities
Never able to stand alone
Without me dashing them out
In a voluntary act of impulse
Striking every letter
With a different color
Because my mind functions better
When ideas are less than abstract
And words come in colors
Yet even these acts are not helping
For I need all the colors in the world
And even much more
To formulate one sentence
That lays down the fact
That I fail to express
How much I miss you