Inner thoughts on writing

The more I postpone getting back to writing
The more I feel the weight of this burden heavier
on my skin and on my mind.
I do not want to deny that there is a lot
going on inside.
I just feel incompetent in trying to capture these emotions
and dressing them with fancy words.
I look back at what I used to write
And I feel distant
Already another person.
Did I lose it?
If I did. How real was it anyway ...
To be able to disappear this fast?