Nocturne*

I am ramping through my thoughts
and through the darkness of the night,
fetching my way,
escaping reality,
dreaming about a better place,
somewhere, elsewhere, where the sun never sleeps ...
Is that on your side of the pillow?

Leftover piece*

So I take my weight back
Your soul can fly unrestricted
Your mind can lose the guilt
It can start seeking a new temptation
For all I care

I rest my case
Lust can only last momentarily
Our madness overcame that time frame
Our obsession became painful
Our greed, let’s face it, can never be satisfied
Unless it feeds on new blood

Next time I will try to tread on tiptoes
Maybe the soul I land on
Would also be too fragile
To handle my emotions

Deception down the hole

It is eating me from the inside
This feeling of deception
I can’t help but sense it
It is sad to see the colors fading
After blinding your eyes
With their gleam and flashes
For a moment, an eternity
Down the hole again
I feel disgusted, annoyed
By the disappointments accumulating
I have lost my will to climb up again
Accelerating motions
But I am stuck in one place
The place you left me
Where we last met

Your lies

I am watching you lie
Observing the countless deceits
Accumulating in my head
Building colorful castles of delight
The reality of which
Is only within the frame of my naïve mind
And the vibes of your voice
I am watching you lie
As I am monitoring the speed of my heart beats
And the flow of blood rushing to my face
As a feeling of contentment is born
And the castles are built again
But the castles are made of thread of wind
It is not long before they collapse
And leave my mind empty
Empty of anything
But your stupid little lies

Inner thoughts on writing

The more I postpone getting back to writing
The more I feel the weight of this burden heavier
on my skin and on my mind.
I do not want to deny that there is a lot
going on inside.
I just feel incompetent in trying to capture these emotions
and dressing them with fancy words.
I look back at what I used to write
And I feel distant
Already another person.
Did I lose it?
If I did. How real was it anyway ...
To be able to disappear this fast?

Reality check

Enough blocking the flow of emotions
They didn’t disappear
They were just put on hold
Until the brain takes a stand
On how to deal with them

i stopped writing

until further emotions
reveal otherwise

stupid little things.

It is fascinating how we – unsophisticated humans – tend to cling to stupid meaningless symbols that remind us of enormous emotions we could have felt at some point in time, of cherished memories of someone who is long gone, of a moment in life where we thought that what we are experiencing is heaven, that we could die in peace; now that light has shown upon us in a moment of elation.

But the light, once there and worshiped, never stays. It fades into filaments of tiny particles that embed in emblems that we encounter in our daily lives; such as the color purple, or the sunrays, or the initials of his name or the sound of the thunder. Stupid little things, serving nothing but bringing out faded memories we are failing to overcome …

Spiral.

Background: Below is a post of non-sense, made up of fragments of nocturnal thoughts shaped by booze, a tired body and a mind overcome by sleeplessness.
Guidelines: If you by any chance happen to grasp a meaning out of this post, then you definitely need to seek help for over using your analytical mind and trying to draw a finding out of nothing but illusions and a bunch of meaningless sentences compressed together in a pathetic attempt to come up with a poem.


The end always has the same glow of the beginning
It is a vicious cycle after all
The one we are living in
It all ends where it begins
Sometimes there are years in between,
Minutes or fragments of a second
But momentary madness undefined by the rules of space and time
Lasts as long as a heartbeat
It could be a fragment of a second,
Minutes or years
But at the end, it all starts where it ends

Is it starting to end… or is it ending into a new start?

Undesirable reminiscences.

We spend our lifetime accommodating to the loss
It could be the death of someone special, or possibly a dog
The failure in a career or the ridiculousness to maintain a social life
The breakup of a long flourished relationship
That we thought was going to last
The death of a nation – or a flag
Any loss

At times, I think we should bow to the magnificent creation
Called forgetting
If the human mind, was able to remember all the single details
Feelings, events, sparks and disappointments
We will be rotting in our memories, forgetting that ahead of us
Lays a new unexplored horizon of many more fights to overcome

If we are trapped in our disappointing memories
Will we ever be able to live?